...are free are books ARE FREE BOOKS.

When I'm not trawling jobstreet, or worrying my self silly about the boards, or doing usual yaya stuff reserved for the Graduate Yet Unemployed, I join book giveaway contests.

It is currently the reason for my existence.

I feel this is a by-effect of getting The Demon's Lexicon four months earlier than the rest of the world by sheer enormous luck (on my first try, ladies and gentlemen, how awesome is that?). I now feel compelled to scour the depths of the internet and beyond, and try my luck at every given opportunity. I find my recent internet ubiquity kind of embarrassing, but shame is null and void where free books are involved.

Why don't you try your luck and join these contests as well? It's fun! And anyway, the books will be totally worth it.

This lovely woman is giving away two lovely ARCs from her set of 21 titles, which includes Collin's Catching Fire, The Eternal Kiss, and Melinda Lo's Ash.

Here you can win Kelley Armstrong's The Summoning. I've heard a lot about this book, and I want to read it for myself.

You might win a hardcover of Claudia Gray's Evernight.

Or The Hate List by Jennifer Brown.

Another lovely lady giving away Lovestruck Summer by Melissa Walker.

Here you might win 8 books, including Twenty Boy Summer, Bad Girls Don't Die, and The Demon's Lexicon.

Another lovely lady giving away Sweethearts by Sara Zarr.

..one of my most favorite books in the history of ever.

The Demon's Lexicon by Sarah Rees Brennan. Someday, when the appropriate technology arrives and society has become more accepting, I'm going to marry it and have babies with it. Because the world needs more excellent books, and also because when you think about it, books make good boyfriends. They don't stink, they provide excellent distraction during boring subjects, and they make drinking coffee more enjoyable! What's not to like?

The Demon’s Lexicon tells the story of sixteen year old Nick who is a busy enough boy, thank you very much. He keeps a constant battle against polysyllabic words; broken cars; and also against murderous magicians and their demons. But when his brother, Alan, becomes marked with a sign of death, Nick must confront the lies that make up his world, cope with the constant presence of the two Crawfords, and haunt the magicians who have always haunted his family.

(I tried very hard on that synopsis, you guys, but it still reads like the one on the back cover with splotches of other reader's better synopses on the internet. I wanted to write something titillating and positively original, but I just CAN'T! :O This is probably because of the fact that The Boards and My Future Career Rumination are dancing tango before my very eyes right now. But just trust me on this: THIS BOOK'S AWESOME.)

I think one of SRB's greatest talent is identifying the most cemented literary conventions, and trampling on them. In this book, heroes are not interested in doing the saving; girly girls are ruthless and efficient; crippled boys show cunning and genuine badass; and the villains are oddly sympathetic. After having my 2586th plot theory dismantled, I thought to myself, “Goodness, this woman is such a troublemaker.” And I do mean troublemaker in the best possible way.

The Demon's Lexicon made me laugh, cry, feel a hundred different emotions, think, and dream. Remember back in high school when we were taught the elements of literature? I distinctly remember that good literature should manifest a "universality of ideas". Of course back then I thought it was just fancily worded bull: I never really understood what it meant. I think I understand it a little better now.

Good books - good writing, in general - have the power to communicate the basic sameness of human beings. As the author presents the reasons for, the circumstances that shaped a character's personality and actions, the reader will have a moment of thinking, "Gundamn, of course he'll act like callous bastard, who wouldn't be a callous bastard under those circumstances?" When you think about it, underneath all the complexities and differences, people are pretty simple to understand.

The characters in TDL are well-developed and believable, the plot so richly layered it calls for repeated reading, the themes solid enough to make an epic series. It all becomes exponentially more awesome when you consider that we are speaking of a debut novel right here.

Debut authors are often treated with kind understanding. They’re still fumbling, yes, but they are valued for their potentialities.

Well, my friend, you better leave your kindness elsewhere and brace yourself for impact instead. There’s not just potential in The Demon’s Lexicon – there’s major kinetic.


The Demon's Lexicon will come out June the 2nd in the US and the UK, which means to say I have absolutely NO idea when it will reach our lovely Philippine shores. I'm hoping for no atrociously protracted (LOL this word reminds me of thesis days) delays. And also to the customs people who want to push through with the book tax (and are subsequently cutting the chances of debut books ever reaching this country), I wish you an eternity of reading nothing but Precious Hearts Romances.

***

i never had any intention to write about...this. maybe it's because i don't want people's pity. maybe it's because i resent our situation too much. maybe it's because i'm afraid people will not understand and laugh. or maybe it's because i'm vain - utterly and lethally proud - and i don't want people to think any less of me. because i already DO feel kind of less, and i hate it.

i realize now that i should've written about it a long time ago. i also realize that i have really, really stupid ideas some of the time.

hello, i'm jezzah and we're really very poor. i'm trying my best to function as best as i can, and i'm trying to overcome my baser, more materialistic and whiny nature. i think i really am getting stronger, and i hope to someday find meaning in all this mess.

i hope you guys a meaningful christmas!

 

I have a new cellphone number, a new landline, a new address. Technically, this is turning over a new leaf - but the turning is making me sick; I'm hanging over the edges, and I'm desperately clinging to things I've lost that had felt like home.

/end melodrama

Because the internet people are incredibly helpful thieving thieves, I now possess a copy of Stephanie Meyer's Twilight.

Man, I'm so excited since everyone's talking about this book. I miss the communal readings nung Harry Potter days! Nerdy kids uniiiite!

Before I read it though, I have to be sure that this is a real copy (haha wtf, pirated na real). So sa mga nakabasa na ng Twilight, does the book start with (SPOILER ALERT, YES DUH)

I'd never given much thought to how I would die — though I'd had reason enough in the last few months — but even if I had, I would not have imagined it like this.

and end with

And he leaned down to press his cold lips once more to my throat.

 ?

Answers would be appreciated muchly. :) To Stephanie Meyer's rabid fans: please don't hunt me and eat my liver for not buying The Original Book. I'm a v. v. poor college student. But hey - If I like this enough, I could probably save for an authentic copy and help make Meyer richer! Or make a review! Isn't that great?

 

saglit lang to kasi nitatamad akong magisip at magsulat.

may sbarro na sa sta lu. may itatayo na ring starbucks. lumelevel up na tayoooo!

kaya yung mga magbibirthday dyan, tanggalin nyo na sa vocabularyo nyo ang "kfc" at "mcdo", okay?

 

Love is so overrated.

I learned a lot from this mess - the potency of feeling too much; the bitter taste of failed expectations; the sheer relief in admitting things I kept denying to myself, so much like the comfort of finally coming home.

But I think the most important lesson of all is this: I realized how resilient a person I really am.

I don't regret any of it, not for a second, but I am so glad because I think I can finally go on with my life.

I am writing this because I want to mark this emotion - to leave an evidence that it ever was before I start anew, a reminder that once it did mean something, at least to me. Because I really am putting a close to this chapter. The last time I'll write about it, because God knows I've wasted too much time and ink and tears than is healthy.

To the lone person who had the misfortune of hearing the entirety of the sordid story, you made letting go so much easier to do.

And to you: thank you for everything. I mean that.

Good bye.

Something is very, very wrong here. I swear I did NOT join ddg_and_sundry. NONONO. I have a Super Secret Worshipful Obsession! If I am part of the maya community, then I will be much closer to doing something deeply embarrassing, like writing a lame-o fanfic of her fanfic, or making a hideous fanvideo or revealing how many times a day I refresh her page (oh GOD!).

See, when I become a fan of something (or someone), I become deranged. In that dark point of my life know as the Vic Zhou Obsession phase, I managed to amass an extensive array of F4 merchandise--from magazines to key chains to stationeries to paper bags to fucking DINNER PLATES. I even emailed a TV station using different pseudonyms (vic zhou gurl, Jessica T, JDT, etc) because I missed watching an F4 special and I was begging for a rerun (I thought, "They're bound to give in to public clamor!"). With my clever use of aliases, that shouldn't have been such a shameful incident, but since I was the queen of dolts, I messaged them using a single email address.

Jeez, even writing about this is making me cringe. It's all so hideously embarrassing and I'd be damned if I fall into the same fannish abyss. That's why I'd rather not participate in any such communities. Give me reinforcements in the form of similarly obsessed fanatics, and I'll  turn rabid all over again. Since I can no longer use the "I was young and easily excitable!" excuse, any resulting embarrassment will be due to my adult, rational and willful choice, which is the worst kind of embarrassment in the world.

Which brings me to the point of this blog: despite having no memory of ever joining ddg_and_sundry, why the hell am I a member? I have two suspicions. First is that the community has some web counter of sorts and they notice my consistent trolling and they thought, "what the hell, why don't you just become a member for reals since you visit this site more than the actual members anyway?" And they added me, the busy and important admin themselves. Because I'm special like that.

The second, and most terrifying, theory is this: my subconscious mind is starting to reign over my actions. I dread the day I do something so hauntingly embarrassing I start requiring help of the shrink so I better steer clear of the interwebz for a while.  But that is for later. In the meantime, I have to agonize whether or not to pull my membership.

Livejournal is infinitely better than multiply.

I wouldn't go into detail as to why because then this entry would morph into a spitting monster rant which would be counterproductive to the whole cultivating a more pleasant writing tone thing I'm currently running.

But still. LJ > Multiply. That's a fact.

My belief that a near-death experience would lead to a reappraisal and redirection of one's life has been mercilessly smashed into tiny tiny pieces, because I've come thisclose to drowning and my life doesn't seem all that changed. I mean, not really. Okay. Not at all.

It's all very patalo: I was getting tired with all the wave-jumping business and kind of spaced out, which turned out to be a very stupid thing to because two seconds later I was snorting liters of pool water.

I clung on for dear life to a limb that turned out to be connected to Pau. Since I wasn't able to shriek for help because of the water in the lungs thing, she was the one who did that.  With flourish. Cue in twenty seconds of heroic carrying and frantic coughing, and I was good as new.